Remembering WHY I'm in it to END it.

One month, 2 days till my marathon.

Let me tell you... I am FREAKING out. I don't feel at all prepared for this shindig. After taking a month off and completely disregarding my "plan" I am stressed to the max to fit all of my work outs and distance runs in.

Through my reading, I have found that two weeks before the marathon you are supposed to start tapering off your runs. Well, that leaves me with one weekend left to make a 20-22 mile run. This weekend. All the planning, travel arrangements were made months in advance when I felt I had plenty of time to train, prepare and psych myself up for this.

I feel untrained, unprepared and unpsyched. This past weekend was brutal to run outside. It must have been 17 degrees out, the wind was forcefully blowing - whipping my hair back and forth, leaving me with wind burned cheeks and a serious case of the chills. After finally making it home, I did everything to try to get comfortable - used my sisters electric blanket, took a hot shower, put on sweats. Nothing worked.

It is in these instances - the ones where I am starting to seriously question myself, my abilities and my mental strength - that I turn to others.

Why I am Running

Several months ago, when I entered this race, that was an easy one to answer. I was running because I could. As a breast cancer survivor and runner, it was an easy choice. Now it is even easier to answer, but will be harder to do. In October, I was released by my oncologist with 10 years of survival behind me. Now just a month later, I am once again the patient. I found out I have cancer in the opposite breast. I am determined to complete this race. While I may run slowly or walk quickly, I will finish! Breast cancer wont stop me!

Mary Kay Donaldson
Beaufort, SC

It is stories like this one that make me realize I really don't have it so bad. So, however tired, however much I want to just give up, I won't. This is all so much bigger than me, and if ever I need that extra inspiration - I'll just turn to those other 8,000 people who are running with me (http://www.breastcancermarathon.com/run/why-im-running/).


Song of the Day:  OneRepublic - Good Life (mad props to Natty T. for providing me with my saweet new playlist. Love you gf.)

Oh, and p.s. in case you haven't seen Donna has put my favorite word as a banner on her website, "inspire". And that is just what I intend to do.

Passionately Pink,
Christy

MIA

Yes, I have been MIA for the past three months. While life has been taking over, I have barely come up for air let alone a chance to write. For those of you wondering, yes I have been training. Yes, I have managed to finish more than five miles (I maxed out at 18). Where have I been, you ask? Well, let me tell you what I have learned over the past month.

The past month has taught me more about life than I have learned over the course of my 22 years here (yes, I know.. big freaking deal). You see, my marathon training was placed on hold for the past month so I could finally support a woman who has always supported me - my Grandma.

I started training for this marathon as a means of self-reflection. Throughout my collegiate  relationships I lost a huge part of who I was. The athlete. The writer. The independent thinker and person. And, not that I didn't appreciate those things I did gain in college, but I still missed those other parts of myself. I figured throughout training I'd be gaining so many of those things back, and while I slowly did a huge part of it all was still missing.

It wasn't till recently that I realized - not only what I was missing but what my life goals were. What I had been passionate about, and what hopefully sparked the passion of others. I love seeing the excitement people get right before Avon Walk for Breast Cancer. It thrills me to see NFL players sporting pink during October. And while I may have lost sight of all that -

My Grandma truly believed I could make a difference.

While I may not yet be the star I once thought I was meant to be... I know that the difference I am making with every step would make her proud. She was the kind of women that believed in a better world. She believed people could make a difference just by sharing a smile.

So, while this marathon may have started out as being a selfish means of self-preservation, it has garnered its way into being a giant momento of the person my Grandma always knew I was. No longer is this marathon about me - its about her. Her passion for life, her caring personality, the lives she touched by sharing her smile.

A smile happens in a flash - but its memory can last a lifetime.

Song of the Day: Holes in the Floor of Heaven - Collin Raye

Passionately Pink,
Christy